Brevity

As long as I am alive there will always be another side—an other side.  In the midst of grief, loss, pain, or transition I often feel as if the struggle will never end.  I get stuck in the mire, sometimes allowing dark thoughts to take over and losing myself for a while.  I forget that … Read more

Helen

Last night I dreamt of being in my paternal grandmother’s house.  It was just as she had left it the day I went with her to the hospital.  We didn’t know then that she would never come home, and would instead spend the end of her life in the clutches of Parkinson’s disease, wasting away … Read more

Disarmed

She found herself in the throes of something cosmic–a purity of heart emanating from the center of her chest.  She could feel lightness take over as the shadows of yesterday receded from her heart and mind.  She stood in silence, allowing the feeling to wash over her.  It was foreign yet beautiful–the antithesis of the … Read more

My Anti-Resolution

Here I am, only one day away from the New Year, unable to make any formal resolutions.  Like so many of us, I used to make promises for each year that primarily involved forms of torture or self-punishment.  Looking back, these resolutions always came from a place of feeling deficient in some way–not successful enough, not thin … Read more

Inside She Was Free

I often wonder how we, as humans, survive?  When I step back and contemplate the number of horrific events that I have lived through—some caused by others and some part of a self-fulfilling prophecy—it is unfathomable to me that I am still here writing this.  Even more surprising is that I am living a peaceful and … Read more

Shedding Anger

Who is forgiveness for? Is it for the object of forgiveness, or is it for us?  Over the course of my life I have suffered many circumstances which brought me to my knees in fear, grief and rage.  I felt trapped in those feelings for a large portion of my adult life.  To me, forgiveness … Read more

Night Walking

Night time can be difficult for me. I equate the night with love (or a lack thereof): being held in the arms of a lover as you both drift to sleep; celebrations with friends as the clock ticks past midnight; and family gatherings in front of a fire on a cold Winter night.  When I am lacking in … Read more