Glimmer

Today I am grateful that I am able to feel grateful.  I am grateful that I feel God’s grace in my life on a daily basis.  There was a time when I felt so deprived and so dark that I resented people who expressed happiness and gratitude.  I did not believe that the world held … Read more

The Well

How do we recover from the daily task of living on days when we feel broken inside?  How do we continue to love even though our hearts get repeatedly broken and after those we trust disappoint us? How do we thrive? These questions crossed my mind tonight as I prepare to spend my first Thanksgiving … Read more

There Were Two

In my nearly 40 years of living, I have been “in love” twice.  The first time around, I failed to realize there was someone else in the picture the whole time. The first time I fell in love, I was 23.  He was gorgeous, aloof, philosophical, and dangerous.  Our physical attraction was magnetic and the … Read more

Seven

“We are born of love; love is our mother.” – Rumi If only these words rang true for me. I have never known a mother’s love. What I received from my mother was toxic, poisonous and, if absorbed, sure to destroy any semblance of self worth I had managed to gather while growing up in … Read more

Even Better. Ever Stronger.

Last night I met up with an old friend whom I had not seen in quite a long time.  The details of life have kept us busy and we made a plan, months ago, to see a Broadway show.  It was so good to see her, for she reminded me of who I am, how … Read more

Inside She Was Free

I often wonder how we, as humans, survive?  When I step back and contemplate the number of horrific events that I have lived through—some caused by others and some part of a self-fulfilling prophecy—it is unfathomable to me that I am still here writing this.  Even more surprising is that I am living a peaceful and … Read more

Crumbs Cannot Feed the Soul

Lately I have been wondering why, in relationships, I have often settled for “crumbs.”  When I go to a bake shop to get a decadent brownie I do not savor the crumbs that fall onto the plate rather than the dessert.  So why do I accept morsels of love rather than abundance? Throughout the years, … Read more

No Knight in Shining Armor

Having been the product of a divorced home, as well as a witness to my parents’ toxic relationships with second spouses, one would think that traditional notions of romance and rescue would not have permeated my world view. In retrospect, I see that the dysfunction and chaos of my childhood drove me closer to the … Read more

Avoiding the Bends

Lately I have been wondering who suffers more—the person who lives each day in denial or one who lives with self-awareness? There has to be a reason for the existence of the phrase “ignorance is bliss.” I know many people who seem to be happy and who do not work on themselves at all.  Is it … Read more

Shedding Anger

Who is forgiveness for? Is it for the object of forgiveness, or is it for us?  Over the course of my life I have suffered many circumstances which brought me to my knees in fear, grief and rage.  I felt trapped in those feelings for a large portion of my adult life.  To me, forgiveness … Read more